Last week E came home and shoved a permission slip under my nose. She is in 5th grade, so what we had in 6th grade called "sex education" back in my day was apparently what was coming. I have no idea what they call it here. The permission slip just said the movie discusses what puberty is and what the body parts are and what it is going to begin doing.
Back home when KC took the class it was a BIG thing. A female teacher took the 5th grade girls and they watched a movie, while a male teacher did the same with the boys. They had open discussions and question and answer sessions. The teachers switched groups so that the kids had a chance to discuss things from the other perspective. I believe they also had mixed group discussions as well, but I cannot remember for sure. They were very good about keeping things real without making it all goofy. They kept the kids on track and if inappropriate questions were asked or topics not allowed to be discussed were brought up, they easily deflected them by saying as much. It was good to have KC come home from school and talk to me about it all in a very mature way, ask questions and tell me about the teacher's handling of it all. (Disclaimer: My memory is far from perfect... KC will probably comment about how I got it ALL WRONG, so don't be surprised! LOL!)
T had this 2 years ago, but him being himself... he would not discuss it with me if his life depended on it and really he blew of Hubster about it too. We tried in vain to get him to have any discussion at all, but it was not in the cards. So I had no idea what to expect for E from this school district. He did manage to fall to the floor laughing when she came home and said the movie was upcoming and asked him if it was bad. He was really no help. Sometimes I have no flippin' idea what to do with that boy!!
E came home on Monday and she had a few questions, but first I asked her to tell me how it all was presented to the kids. Well I am disappointed to say the least. They stuck the kids all in a room with the school nurse. She played the movie, asked if anyone had questions and then when no one was willing to ask she sent them back to class. They were not made to feel as if they could ask questions! The nurse was not coming to them and talking to them at their level and easing them into a healthy discussion. It was all very sterile and that was very disappointing to learn. So E and I had a very frank discussion and she asked me her questions and I explained things she was unclear on from the movie. All in all it went well.
I am a parent who believes in calling body parts by their correct names. It makes no sense to me to call them by cutesy poopsy names. So while my kids turn pinkish, because that is what kids do, at the mention of the parts, they are used to hearing the names and therefore do not fall into giggle fits over them. I also believe that as a parent I am obligated to tell my kids ALL they need to know, just not all at once and only when it is age appropriate. Since I KNOW my kids pretty well I feel that they know what they need to know. Some parents over explain and some parents under explain, but at least those parents are explaining. The parents that do not explain anything worry me -- A LOT! Many parents object to the school teaching this stuff and I suppose I can see why to some degree as control is removed from us a little, BUT I really feel like the school's sex education can be beneficial. Kids who might not want to talk to their parents, for whatever reason, need another venue.
I am curious... How have you dealt with this issue? What is your comfort level in having the discussions related to your child's bodily changes? How do you feel about school teaching your kids about their bodies?
I always have TONS of crap rolling around in my head, but often when I sit down to say something on this here blog-o-mine, I go BLANK! If you know me, you know that me and not having something to say are not often in the same thought process! I asked the Hubster the other day if he had any thoughts on blog topics, but rather than share his ideas, he sent me links to the ideas of other bloggers about what to blog about. After bumbling through the blogosphere, I have encountered commentary from others on the same problem, thus I decided to post the links that Hubster gave me. Maybe these will prove useful to some, any, all or none of us, but it is worth a try!
People who come to my house regularly tell me it is so clean. I am generally baffled by this, because in my eyes, it is regularly NOT CLEAN! In fact I cannot believe I live within these walls of filth most days.
My Dad was a vigilante about the house. He claims my Mom was the vigilante, BUT I was on the receiving end of his wrath not hers when it came to deciding whether my results were satisfactory (You might guess that my results were usually UN-satisfactory!) chore completion . So, I will stick with what I know!
If the laundry wasn't perfectly folded and creased crisply... If the handkerchiefs weren't perfectly pressed into quarters... If the baseboards were not vacuumed after you dragged out the furniture to vacuum the carpet underneath... If the bed was not made to Navy standards (read bounce a quarter on it)... If the bathroom floor wasn't fit to eat a meal on... If there was any portion of pristine white covered by any speck of dirt in the bathroom... If your room showed any signs that an actual person resided in there...
You get the idea, yes?? Well if it wasn't perfect, it was done over... and over, and over and over -- usually while he was breathing down my neck yelling about getting it done right. Mind you, he moved out when I was 13, so all that pressure began very young. After he left the chore regimen was SIGNIFICANTLY less stringent.
When I moved out on my own, I kept my room clean. When I moved in with a roommate, I roomed with someone who was as clean freakish, if not more-so than I was. When I moved in with the man who eventually became the Hubster, I was impressed that his bachelor pad was neat and tidy, but I was scrubbing it down almost from the get-go.
We moved into our first house and I was a vigilante pressuring only myself, even though I had a 5 y.o. and was 5 months pregnant. Our house was on a 1/3 acre lot with A LOT of grass. The neighbors thought I was insane. I would go out after Hubster and daughter left in the morning and I would mow for 20 minutes the take a break for 20 minutes, repeated until the job was completed HOURS later. At which time I would go in and begin dinner. After dinner I would scrub down the kitchen, even if I only made something from a box.
When we had friends over, I cleaned the house from top to bottom for 3 days and up until 15 minutes before the guests were to arrive. After they left, if it wasn't the middle of the night I started over. If it was late I did the kitchen and then went to bed and spent the next 3 days cleaning up after our filthy heathen friends left. (Love you guys! lol! :-) Once I started I could not stop. We had our son in late July, and he liked to puke... EVERYWHERE! When he started sitting up in the bouncer he would smile at me while he spit up. When he started crawling, he left trails around the rooms. I thought I was going to DIE from the cleaning!
18 months later we had yet another spitting child, and I began to waver in my vigilance. I could not keep up. I would be in tears if I even thought about picking up a sponge. And so I learned to fake clean. I had very few items out to get dusty, so I could hold a baby in one arm and a dust rag in the other and zip through it. My son loved to vacuum and so I gave him the vacuum and set him to work on one side of a room while I did the other side. I decided to ignore base boards that were behind furniture and I stopped moving the furniture all the time. I picked one day a week to do laundry and that was the only chore I did that day.
I was lucky for a short while that we were financially flush enough to have a local woman come in to clean house. She was affordable and about as anal as I am! That was great, except I cleaned for the cleaning woman... EVERY TIME! I miss Kathy very much. She made things look easy, but I know it is always easier to do someone else's house because you are not attached.
In the here and now, there is no money for a house keeper. My kids are all old enough to have chores. They vacuum, dust, clean bathrooms, take out trash and recycling, and clean up their bedrooms. They are not very good at most of it, BUT I resigned myself to this a while back. If something is so badly done that I cannot stand it, I will go behind and fix it my way, BUT by and large they do a passable job. They hate their chores, as I did as a kid, and the drag their feet and grumble, however they have it easy. They just don't know it yet!
Do your kids do chores? What do they do? How well do they do them? Do you feel like you live in a sty, even as visitors tell you how nice and clean your home is? I often wonder about that phenomenon!
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Seven things that you did not know about the Bitchin' MommaC
1)I am kind of shy, till I get to know you.
2) I am a homebody at heart, so COME ON OVER and we'll have a Margarita or 2!
3) I grew up just minutes from the White House
4) I am so bad at art, I can't draw stick people!
5) I LOVE Yankee Candles!
6) I dream of traveling to England, Ireland and Italy to research my roots in-depth.
On January 17, 2004 my daughter, KC, was diagnosed with Nodular Sclerosing Hodgkin's Lymphoma Stage 2-B. She began chemotherapy on January 23, 2004 and completed chemotherapy on April 9, 2004.
As cancer goes, hers was an easy one. We were told that if you have to have it, hers is the one to get. A strange way of putting it to say the least! That she was lucky is also strange to say, because who feels lucky when there is a cancer diagnosis? However, she was lucky. Hers was caught early and addressed early. She participated in a study and thankfully was randomized OUT of having to have Radiation therapy.
Now, KCis a freshman in college and is doing really well. Healthy, smart and hopefully in line to get a great job paying lots of money so she can take care of us in our dotage when she graduates!
OK, so I finished Unbroken, by Laura Hillenbrand and it was an amazing read. What those in POW camps suffered during WWII was awful. I have read much in the past about the Holocaust, but I had never read much about the other side of the war. The Japanese POW camps were no better than the German counterparts and in some ways maybe worse. No part of WWII can be categorized as trivial in my eyes. It was a war that I hope we never endure again, but sadly I don't believe we will be able to prevent it forever.
The main story revolves around Louis Zamperini and what his experiences were. This amazing man survived the crash of a B-24 Liberator with 2 others from the plane. The 3rd man passed away after about a month at sea. Louie and the pilot were 47 days at sea. Their lifeboat carried them about 2 thousand miles from the crash. When they finally found land, they were very close to getting to an island and hiding out, but it was not meant to be. A Japanese ship saw them and they were intercepted. Capture landed them in various POW camps, each worse than the one before. They were not listed with the RED CROSS, so their families were told they were dead after 1 year MIA. Of note here is that their Mother's did not believe they were dead. They just had that feeling -- the one you can't explain, but you feel in your soul.
I am amazed at the atrocities men suffered in camp and further amazed that anyone was able to survive it! It takes a lot out of you just to survive war and for a POW to survive after a severe lack of food and water, living in filth, and regular beatings I know I could not. I would have curled up and died as soon as possible.
I believe that everyone ought to read about the men and women of WWII from all sides. In my schooling there was far to little education about this war and I never had a healthy respect for it until I was over 30. That is sad!
This book both broke my heart and made me feel especially fortunate to be here. I won't tell more of the story because I believe that the book cannot be related even close to what it deserves. All I know is I personally am glad I read it and though it is not my usual reading material it touched me in many ways.
I hope you will read it. L.H. wrote this book extremely well. I had trouble putting it down. I laughed, I cried, I got angry and it was so worth it.
Recently I read a blog review of Skinny Girl Margarita. The review was so hyped with positivity that there was nothing I could do to avoid buying some to try. I mean really, I felt no less than OBLIGATED!
WELL, let me tell you... It was DISGUSTING! Kerosene would taste better. This was so disappointing to me, because I LOVE a good Margarita. When I read a review that glowing, just so neon it makes me want it like I wanted my husband way back when we were trying to make a baby, I am seriously expecting some good ass shit!
All I can say is that I am glad we also bought some of the Margarita we know and love at the same time... JUST IN CASE, because Skinny Girl was sooo very bad that we could not even fake our way through it!
Just my opinion of course, but whooo doggy that was some kinda NARSTY!