Did you know that cutting coupons from the Sunday paper could lead to a major Facebook cleansing? WELL, neither did I! Until today, that is.
I sat here cutting coupons and thinking how this effort is largely wasted energy on my part, because now the coupons require the purchase of so many of one thing... Fact is, I don't usually need 2 or 3 of something so saving $0.25 or $0.50 seems lost in the grand scheme, because I should not have to spend 2-3+ times more than I need to get one thing on a coupon... SO, sitting here realizing how much energy I was putting into something that was most likely going to turn out to be a waste of energy led my mind into a wandering meandering exploration of other things that I might be wasting energy on.
WELL, let me tell you... it's like I had an epiphany or something! I realized that I am often hurt and that I allow myself to be hurt by keeping the hope of something better in certain friendships going. However, after being hurt numerous times, one does start to realize that there is a limit. Recently I had come to realize I was at that limit with a few people. Some of these people are guilty of just the hurt, while others are guilty of not only hurting BUT exploiting or attempting to exploit my willingness to be available and even my loneliness so far from home.
The door has been slammed shut on being available to help certain people out or awaiting some sort of equality in a supposed friendship, is it any wonder after getting burned for it repeatedly? After coming to that conclusion a week or 2 ago, I realized today that I was still giving these folks my time and energy, because I was still seeing their lives and such play out via Facebook AND paying attention to their details. Often this would lead me to feel something, be it sadness, anger or frustration.
Today that has ended. I have never claimed to be perfect or the most wonderful person in the world and there is no doubt that I have made my share of mistakes and major fuck-ups. BUT I do claim the right to not be hurt anymore, so I UN-friended the people who make me most miserable in their treatment of me. I have yet to do that to a couple relations that deserve it, but their time may be coming soon too...
I feel a little empowered and slightly more in control of things. I hope that this euphoria will last! If it doesn't I will work with it. I also hope that the fall-out, if any, does not damage my Hubster who remains FB friends and friendly with these folks.
So I have no more to say on this except that it was a long time coming and I feel good!